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TERA SUPPORT IS HILARIOUS


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#1 Smurph

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Posted 12 May 2012 - 02:39 AM

The following conversation features grape flavored condoms, types of condoms, and extreme humor.

SubjectChat Session Discussion Thread GM Dubstar said...05/12/2012 12:30 AMLet me know if you have any other questions..

Brandon “GM Dubstar”
EME Customer Support - Specialist


** OUR STAFF WILL NEVER ASK FOR YOUR PASSWORD **
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Chat Transcript05/12/2012 12:29 AMHi, my name is GM Dubstar. How may I help you?
Smurph .: Hey.
Smurph .: How are you doing? :D
Smurph .: Uhm. One second please :D
Smurph .: Alrighty
Smurph .: Hi
Smurph .: My name in game is Condoms
Smurph .: and my guild members are feeling semi offended by the name
Smurph .: as well as some of the players in game.
Smurph .: I was wondering if I could get you to change my name?
GM Dubstar: lolol sure
Smurph .: :D
Smurph .: Dubstar. So pro.
Smurph .: So atm I'm on my mini toon
GM Dubstar: I'd be offended too if I was running around with male genitals..
Smurph .: Smurph.
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: Most hellarious support ever.
Smurph .: Alright
Smurph .: So im on smurph
Smurph .: im about to delete it
Smurph .: Could you have my name Condoms
Smurph .: renamed to Smurph?
GM Dubstar: What server, young condom?
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: Valley of Titans
GM Dubstar: To smurph?
Smurph .: Yeahp
Smurph .: let me delete real fast
GM Dubstar: And want the one on BC changed too?
GM Dubstar: Dont delete anything..
Smurph .: BC?
GM Dubstar: Please
Smurph .: Oops.
Smurph .: :l
Smurph .: Already deleted Smurph
Smurph .: meh.
Smurph .: Its no big deal. it was a lvl 28 toon that I am no longer using
GM Dubstar: Mk..
Smurph .: I dont have one on bc.
Smurph .: or at least not that im aware of.
GM Dubstar: It says you do.
GM Dubstar: Named condom
Smurph .: Uhh.
GM Dubstar: But your good to go, young Smurph
Smurph .: Nope.
Smurph .: Kay
Smurph .: Oh
GM Dubstar: You know what would be really weird?
Smurph .: one more tang.
Smurph .: What?
GM Dubstar: A Smurph condom lol
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: My toon is still named Condoms.
GM Dubstar: Hmm.. This is a sticky situation
GM Dubstar: lolz
GM Dubstar: Close your launcher
GM Dubstar: And give it another thrust
Smurph .: Zoomfg lol
Smurph .: Gonna go all day huh?
Smurph .: :D
Smurph .: Is it also possible for me to change my appearance?
Smurph .: Make my toon look more..
Smurph .: short and blue
Smurph .: I'm already an elin
Smurph .: just the hair isnt blue.
Smurph .: It'll bug me to no end.
GM Dubstar: Once again, restart launcher
Smurph .: Booting.
Smurph .: Elder dubstar.
Smurph .: Still nuthin.
GM Dubstar: '''____'''
Smurph .: ill reboot it again
GM Dubstar: Go to the banker or parcel claim window
Smurph .: Okay
GM Dubstar: You actually have to exit the launcher as well
Smurph .: Oh
Smurph .: Didnt do that
Smurph .: Still nothin
Smurph .: loggging in and heading to banker thingy
Smurph .: extra g in there.
Smurph .: for fun iguess
Smurph .: Okay.
Smurph .: I'm there.
Smurph .: Did you change Condom's name?
Smurph .: I'm Condoms
Smurph .: multiple.
GM Dubstar: On VT?
GM Dubstar: Lol what?
Smurph .: Valley of Titans
Smurph .: Yeah I'm Condoms
Smurph .: Awe snap you did condom?
GM Dubstar: You should be smurph?
Smurph .: Nope.
Smurph .: Still Condoms.
GM Dubstar: Great.. Now we have 2 condoms, and only 1 smurph..
Smurph .: lol.
GM Dubstar: How is this gonna work out??
Smurph .: Idk.
Smurph .: What happened? lol
Smurph .: Whats the problemo here xD
Smurph .: Tell me what to do oh wise one.
GM Dubstar: Hmm.. I think that name is already taken?
Smurph .: No.
Smurph .: I just deleted it
Smurph .: like while we were talking
Smurph .: Smurph
GM Dubstar: I see that..
Smurph .: Mmk..
GM Dubstar: How's Dr. Smurph?
Smurph .: D:
Smurph .: Nuuu. Smurph
GM Dubstar: Or smurph.condoms
Smurph .: What happened?
GM Dubstar: Smurph.condoms.inc..
Smurph .: How is Smurph taken already?
Smurph .: lol
GM Dubstar: You can have your own condom company inside the world of tera?
Smurph .: Lol?
GM Dubstar: Be all like come here buddy, I have my condom on, I'm ready to go!!
GM Dubstar: Haha jk..
Smurph .: Lol
GM Dubstar: But Its not letting me change it right now
Smurph .: My guild members are Loling hard about this stuff.
Smurph .: Whys that?
GM Dubstar: Maybe we shall give it a minute
Smurph .: mmk.
Smurph .: I have minutes.
Smurph .: and hours.
Smurph .: friday night no lifer right here.
Smurph .: Shall we chit chat?
GM Dubstar: Haha I'm down
GM Dubstar: I cant take too long though
Smurph .: How does one like yourself become a "GM"
GM Dubstar: I was born as such..
Smurph .: lol
GM Dubstar: Raised by the popori
GM Dubstar: trained by the amen
GM Dubstar: Then granted powers by the priest when ready
GM Dubstar: A really long, tough process
Smurph .: q
Smurph .: Lol
GM Dubstar: Kind of like 300
GM Dubstar: That's what the sky looks like here, too
Smurph .: Are all GMs so...
Smurph .: trolly?
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: All I wanted change my condom and now im getting all these stories
Smurph .: TERRIBLE SUPPORT
Smurph .: RAGE
GM Dubstar: hey.. that's Terable support round here
GM Dubstar: and all this is coming from a condom..
GM Dubstar: That's why you smell bro
Smurph .: Woah
Smurph .: Too far man!
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: They pay you for this? GM stuff?
GM Dubstar: Earlier, I saw a little crab from Cutthroat harbor running across you earlier
Smurph .: in TERA accounts? :D
GM Dubstar: Nah its more like slavery
Smurph .: Awe Jeepers
Smurph .: I'd work as a GM
GM Dubstar: Restart the launcher now, btw
Smurph .: they'd have to pay me in condoms tho
Smurph .: MAGNUMS ONLY
Smurph .: Not to brag. But I'm rockin at least a pinky.
GM Dubstar: Hahaha whatever..
Smurph .: pinky and a half on a good day.
Smurph .: umad.
GM Dubstar: This link if for you brotha:
GM Dubstar: http://www.allcondom...ger-condoms.htm
Smurph .: Offended!
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: I'm soooooooo screenshotting this entire convo bro.
GM Dubstar: wait till you see your new name.. Mr.Small.Condom
GM Dubstar: lolol
Smurph .: If you'd like I can bleep yer name out tho. Dont want you to get in truble xD
Smurph .: Aye it worked
Smurph .: Now how about my look? Can I edit that somehow?
Smurph .: My hair mostly.
Smurph .: I mean if my name is smurph, gotta play the part.
Smurph .: blue hair n all.
GM Dubstar: Idc bout the name.. Dubstar will become a know world wide entity..
Smurph .: lol
GM Dubstar: The worlds first large-scale Smurph Condom Manufacture ;)
Smurph .: Ahh
Smurph .: I see it now.
Smurph .: Rolling in the condoms.
Smurph .: We make them Smurph size
Smurph .: All of asia be so happy
Smurph .: We very happy asian man
Smurph .: So happy!
Smurph .: Asia man wear long time!
Smurph .: All time!
GM Dubstar: Lolololz
Smurph .: xD
GM Dubstar: that just made my day..
GM Dubstar: I was about to go home
GM Dubstar: But effff it, I'll stay for another 8 hrs.. Hoping to get a player as BA as you
Smurph .: Awe Shinazzy.
Smurph .: No way that will happen.
Smurph .: COSMETICS BRO
Smurph .: I WANT THE BLUE HAIRS
Smurph .: DO UHT
GM Dubstar: I thought we went over this?
Smurph .: MOST IMPORTANT PART OF TERA EXPERIENCE
Smurph .: No we got caught up in the condoms
GM Dubstar: You cant change your look unless you have a mutated disease with crabs on you..
GM Dubstar: Which smurphs are immune to
Smurph .: Jeepers
Smurph .: the one time condoms have foiled my plan
GM Dubstar: Nah, go to the banker..
GM Dubstar: One time??
Smurph .: Yeah
GM Dubstar: I usually reuse those suckers..
Smurph .: I aint got kids
Smurph .: Lol
GM Dubstar: Me neither
Smurph .: Dude
Smurph .: I could milk this all day
Smurph .: You just give me anything I want
Smurph .: Lolololol
GM Dubstar: Go to the banker and get your stupid little parcel, and make yourself blue
Smurph .: Milk. Condoms. Semen.
Smurph .: Lulz
Smurph .: Thanks bro.
Smurph .: THANKS
Smurph .: AND ITS NOT STUPID
Smurph .: ITS IMPORTANT
Smurph .: IMPORTANT PARCEL
GM Dubstar: Eww..
Smurph .: Parcel not there yet
Smurph .: Idk
GM Dubstar: Have you got the parcel yet?
Smurph .: No
GM Dubstar: So why it wouldn't let me change your name earlier..
Smurph .: I hadnt taken my condom off yet.
Smurph .: I forgot.
Smurph .: >.<
GM Dubstar: Is I accidentally changed some character named Condom to smurph
GM Dubstar: And he had 3 condom characters.. On 3 different servers
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: Someone is dedicated.
Smurph .: Really doesnt want to have kids
GM Dubstar: So if anyone ever tells you their getting screwed by Tera..
Smurph .: Be like wtfbbq?
Smurph .: Lol
GM Dubstar: You can say at least there's at least a condom on all the servers ;d
Smurph .: Yeah
Smurph .: Makes sense.
Smurph .: Procrastinating parcel.
Smurph .: So do you play tera
Smurph .: or just work for enmasse.
GM Dubstar: I played before launch on the production server
GM Dubstar: And made it to lvl 25
GM Dubstar: But since launch I havent had time to play
GM Dubstar: We got 4 more min's to chat, btw..
Smurph .: Busy fixing condoms.
Smurph .: You're shift over in 4m ins
Smurph .: or what.
Smurph .: your*
GM Dubstar: Nope, gotta go help more gamers ;d
Smurph .: Ahh fun.
GM Dubstar: But you'll get the appearance change tomorrow.
Smurph .: Now I see the real reason for que time.
Smurph .: Ahh thanks.
GM Dubstar: So you get to run around another day looking like a condom
Smurph .: My hair is purple.
Smurph .: MEH
GM Dubstar: Yeah, once your in, its like VIP
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: Well hey man
GM Dubstar: http://www.condomdep...id/207/pid/2380
Smurph .: If you ever get to play
Smurph .: Play on Valley of Titans
GM Dubstar: I found ya!!!
Smurph .: and send me a tell
Smurph .: lolol
GM Dubstar: I hear that's where its at..
Smurph .: VoT?
Smurph .: yeah pretty big server.
Smurph .: PvP all day.
Smurph .: No lifer kids like me always online.
GM Dubstar: Yep, that seems to be the most intense one..
GM Dubstar: But you should actually get that deal once you restart the browser
Smurph .: Well between the 4chan guilds
Smurph .: and the reddit guilds.
Smurph .: What deal?
Smurph .: oh hey
GM Dubstar: Sorry, launcher lol
Smurph .: got the parcel thingy
GM Dubstar: Your good to go
Smurph .: didnt need to restart.
GM Dubstar: :D
GM Dubstar: Realyy? That's odd
Smurph .: Real odd.
Smurph .: Well seriously dude
Smurph .: Thanks
Smurph .: Alot
Smurph .: You're super canoodling cool
GM Dubstar: Oh well..
Smurph .: Best support I have ever had.
GM Dubstar: You as well, my man..
Smurph .: Hellarious
GM Dubstar: That's what were aiming for..
Smurph .: : d
Smurph .: Serious, EU Tera support I heard is terrible
Smurph .: Froggster? Jeepers dat.
GM Dubstar: And you caught me at hour 15 of my shift, so your starting to catch a different side of me lol
Smurph .: You guys here though. Doing good work.
GM Dubstar: Yeah Everyone and their aunt likes our support
GM Dubstar: Besides trolls
GM Dubstar: but trolls will be trolls
Smurph .: 15 hours
Smurph .: you work 24 hours straight?
Smurph .: or what.
GM Dubstar: I'm trying lol
Smurph .: Money must be good.
Smurph .: You work from home?
GM Dubstar: We might run out of coffee soon though, if I keep at it
GM Dubstar: Nah we got an office
GM Dubstar: Our own office
Smurph .: Out of where?
GM Dubstar: Some realm over Tera..
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: Kay.
GM Dubstar: Looking down on yall fools runnin around slayin each other
Smurph .: Lol
Smurph .: Well alright dude
Smurph .: Lookout for a post on TERA forums called Dubstar World Wide Entity
GM Dubstar: Any more questions for the mighty Dubstar before we depart?
Smurph .: Humn..
Smurph .: Uhh... Got any free stuff you can give me?
GM Dubstar: Lol Ill call the Tera IRS tomorrow and get things squared away
Smurph .: Idk.
GM Dubstar: Mmh not today lol
Smurph .: Lol alright
Smurph .: Then I'm set
GM Dubstar: I'll send you an email so you can come strait to me if you have any more issues
Smurph .: Serious?
Smurph .: Thanks
GM Dubstar: You seem like the type to repost this..
Smurph .: repost what?
GM Dubstar: This convo
Smurph .: Yeah
Smurph .: Totally plan on it.
Smurph .: You said you were cool with it.
GM Dubstar: So WHUDDDDDDDDDDDUP REDDIT
Smurph .: Lol kay.
GM Dubstar: That's the fattest shout out yall have got to date..
Smurph .: Meh. I guess ill post it on reddit
GM Dubstar: And my main man condom aka Papa Smurph..
Smurph .: though I dont really use it alot.
Smurph .: Papa condom.
Smurph .: xD
GM Dubstar: Please dont lol
Smurph .: Dude you just gave them a shoutout
Smurph .: I gotta now.
GM Dubstar: But if you wern't planning on it please don't!
Smurph .: The world must see it
Smurph .: THE WORLD MUST SEE THE TRUE POWER
Smurph .: OF SMURPH CONDOM INC.
GM Dubstar: Haha whatever bro do what you do..
GM Dubstar: Lololz
Smurph .: and Dubstar enterprises.
Smurph .: Alright get to work slacker.
Smurph .: Pz
Smurph .: oh wait
Smurph .: that link.
Smurph .: gimme.
GM Dubstar: haha what link?
Smurph .: GM Dubstar: I'll send you an email so you can come strait to me if you have any more issues
Smurph .: oh email
Smurph .: alrighty
Smurph .: D3rp
Smurph .: Well then alright thats it.
Smurph .: Cya dude.
Smurph .: Thanks for the help and the laughs!
GM Dubstar: lol have a good one, have fun!!
'Smurph .' disconnected ('Concluded by Agent'). [---001:010893:28166---]
  • 1
Floatin from game to game.

#2 Throne

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Posted 12 May 2012 - 10:40 AM

this, was awesome
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You must be the change you wish to see in the world. - Ghandi

#3 James P.

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Posted 12 May 2012 - 12:44 PM

wow LOL I duno what jus happend that was lol!
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#4 Xanther

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Posted 12 May 2012 - 11:53 PM

HAHAHAHAHA ^.^
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#5 Skywise

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Posted 13 May 2012 - 03:06 AM

LOL best support convo ive seen!
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#6 Throne

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Posted 13 May 2012 - 04:30 PM

Would love to see the dude on BC who named his guy "condom" login and see his name changed to "smurph"
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You must be the change you wish to see in the world. - Ghandi

#7 Rav

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Posted 14 May 2012 - 11:54 AM

i tried not to laugh at work, but i failed..


GM Dubstar: You know what would be really weird?
Smurph .: one more tang.
Smurph .: What?
GM Dubstar: A Smurph condom lol
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#8 Smurph

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Posted 14 May 2012 - 01:42 PM

My favorite part is his explanation of how he became a GM.
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#9 Minflexzel

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Posted 14 May 2012 - 08:57 PM

I might just play Tera now because of GM's like him!

He is my hero!

<3
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#10 Kamen

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Posted 22 May 2012 - 10:21 PM

HA! Very nice read. Thanks for posting this.
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#11 Smurph

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 08:40 PM

Apparently I got this guy fired. I took the post down and he did say I was aloud to post it in the first place, yet I still feel guilty.
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#12 Skjoldr

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Posted 25 May 2012 - 08:58 PM

Man, I could actually buy this game for this reason. Good stuff :)
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#13 Throne

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Posted 26 May 2012 - 12:06 AM

Don't fret about it Smurph.

It's tough to know the value of greatness without getting fired first.

I would say, if he was fired, it was certainly in a blaze of glory not to be soon forgotten.
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You must be the change you wish to see in the world. - Ghandi






Recent blog entries on this topic

Photo

TERA SUPPORT IS HILARIOUS

By Throne in Throne's Blog, on 12 May 2012 - 10:42 AM

Conversation between CotP member "Smurph" and TERA Support

SubjectChat Session Discussion Thread GM Dubstar said...05/12/2012 12:30 AMLet me know if you have any other questions..

Brandon “GM Dubstar”
EME Customer Support - Specialist


** OUR STAFF WILL NEVER ASK FOR YOUR PASSWORD...

Read Full Entry →